Pregnancy loss is one of the biggest losses faced by a mother, and its risk increases as women get older. However, it is still seen as a stigma, and many women are ashamed or even feel guilty after losing their babies.
Hence, Jessica Zucker who started a movement on social media with #IHadAMiscarriage soon became an Instagram sensation with 13.8k followers. It became a refuge for other women where they could share their stories. Many women shared some moving accounts of their miscarriage and how they faced the misfortune.
It has become an excellent platform to share and empathize with women who have been through or are going through this pain.
# IHadAMiscarriage I had a 2nd trimester miscarriage. This is a fact of my life. An experience that changed who I am. Pregnancy after pregnancy loss changed me all the more. I have no shame. No self-blame. No guilt. I did nothing wrong. I did nothing to deserve this. My body works. I don’t feel it failed. I embrace my grief fully and allow it to wash over me. I grieve still. I don’t believe rainbow babies “replace” our lost loves. When we lean into heartache, we evolve. When we work vigorously to stave it off, we drown. I don’t believe everything happens for a reason. I know I am not alone, nor are you. _ This campaign is here for anyone who has experienced any type of pregnancy or infant loss. We are here to share stories with the aim of softening stigma and ushering in connection. Let this space be a life line. An anchor. A community. _ What an elating honor it is to have my work and specifically this page featured on @selfmagazine today. Link in profile. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #stillbirth #infantloss #motherhood #grief #loss #parenthood #pregnancyafterloss #rainbowbaby #1in4 // This sign accompanied the birth of the I Had A Miscarriage campaign in 2014. Lettering by @annerobincallig.
@channelfrida shares: After the first miscarriage I thought about getting a small halo tattoo that only I would see and understand the meaning of. Never did I imagine I would go through it 3 more times in less than 11 months. _ Now that we have an answer and a hopeful solution, I decided to spend this waiting period before surgery and before TTC again to design this tattoo with the help of an amazingly talented and gracious tattoo artist. One birth month flower for every due date we will mourn. Two hearts, mine and my husband’s, amidst the garden. _ Sitting for this tattoo was a strange and emotional experience. The physical pain was rough, but nothing compared to the past year, and I kept thinking this tribute was oddly fitting. _ I look forward to the moment I will be able to wrap these arms around our rainbow baby, and one day share the meaning of my mural of flowers with them. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #grief #recurrentmiscarriage #loss #rainbowbaby #pregnancyafterloss #motherhood
✨Grief knows no timeline, take all the time you need✨ _ Anything but linear, grief pops up when you least expect it, alerting us to our vulnerability. Our humanity. Reminding us that grief doesn’t evaporate and surely never gets tied up in a box with a fancy bow. _ “It’s been 7 weeks since my loss, why am I still feeling so low?” Resist the rush, the judgement, surrender control. _ The light will come, magic even. We just don’t know when, where, or how. But it comes. _ We’re here to catch you if you fall. Lean in. _ Commissioned artwork by the talented @grrlgangart. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #stillbirth #pregnancyloss #grief #infantloss #loss #motherhood #pregnancyafterloss #1in4
Miscarriage does not discriminate // Race, class, culture, ethnicity, age, education, religion = miscarriage does not consider these details // We are 1 in 4 // We are community _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #motherhood #stillbirth #grief #loss #pregnancyafterloss #rainbowbaby #1in4 • Photo by @hankwillisthomas found via @the.pinklemonade.
@tessastephens__ shares: “One year ago today admiring my changing body, my growing son. What I wouldn’t give to feel Jude’s movements again….What I wouldn’t give to have him here in my arms. Nothing more beautiful than a mother and the love for her child ?.” _ #IHadAMiscarriage #pregnancyloss #stillbirth #lifeafterloss #loss #preeclampsia #hellpsyndrome #grief #bereavedmother #infantloss #lossmom #20weeks #pregnancy
• I would have terminated my much wanted pregnancy • _ At 16-weeks along my baby fell from my body while home alone on that dreadful Thursday in October. _ My amniocentesis was scheduled for the 18-week mark. She died before we made it to that point. _ However, after cutting the umbilical cord myself, racing to my doctor’s office while hemorrhaging with my baby in a bag, enduring an unmedicated emergency D&C, leaving 3 hours later physically and emotionally deflated, my baby was taken to the lab for testing. _ My doctor cautioned that we might not receive definitive results from the tests, but informed us that we would hear something in approximately 2 weeks. _ Twelve days later my doctor phoned with the news. My sweet girl had a chromosomal abnormality. I took a deep breath for the first time in days. This news felt reassuring to me and my husband alike. _ As I speedily researched the specifics of the chromosomal issues, I knew for certain that had I not had this miscarriage and made it to the amnio, I would have opted to terminate this much wanted pregnancy based on the profound complications she likely would have had, had she made it out alive. _ My choice. _ I have not an ounce of shame feeling this or sharing this. _ When people judge these types of “decisions”, it only serves to indicate that they are living in the theoretical, embedded in religiosity, or worse, lack the capacity for empathy altogether. _ Walk in her shoes, then speak. _ And to all you mamas out there who have been faced with this “decision”, I support you wholeheartedly! You are courageous. You are not alone. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #stillbirth #infantloss #grief #loss #motherhood #pregnancyloss #stillwerise // Art found via @_stillwerise.
No Mother By Jessica Costanzo @hitch160. Stories from around the world. Posted with permission. _ No mother should learn at 16 weeks pregnant that the child she is carrying has a fatal condition. No mother should have to decide if she carry her terminally ill child to term or end her pregnancy. No mother should have to explain to their 2.5 year old son that his baby brother has died. No mother should have her milk come in when she has no child to feed. _ No mother should find out at the 8 week ultrasound for her next pregnancy that her baby has passed away. No mother should bleed for over a week as that child leaves her body. No mother should see in a 12 week ultrasound that yet another baby that has passed away – a baby that was moving a week before is now still and has no heartbeat. No mother should birth that baby stillborn at home and literally see the glimmer of what could have been. _ No father should lose his child and then watch in fear as his wife bleeds excessively and is rushed to the ER for emergency surgery. _ No mother should experience any of these things, yet I have experienced them all. _ About 20% of pregnancies end in miscarriage yet the experiences are rarely talked about. I write about my experiences so other mothers know they are not alone. No mother should face such pain in isolation. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #pregnancyloss #grief #loss #motherhood #stillbirth #1in4 #miscarriage // Image found via @taxcollection.
Rushing the Pain by @jazzandkate. Stories from around the world (Connecticut). Posted with permission. _ “Deciding not to have another baby was the only way I could garner some control over all that happened to me over the past year. Two baby boys that I’d never meet. Two baby brothers that my daughter would never have. There are worse things than having an only child, I told myself. It’s time to be grateful for what you have and move on. _ Six weeks after my second loss, I was steadfast to get all things baby out of my house. I packed boxes, organizing everything immaculately as I went. I considered selling but the process seemed too time consuming. I needed it it if my house as quickly as possible. Thousands of dollars of inventory, gone. It felt therapeutic in the moment but now that it’s gone, I sit here wondering, “what have I done?” _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #motherhood #pregnancyafterloss #grief #loss #1in4 // Artwork by @Marco.demasi found via @jasoncampbellstudio.
I think it’s official! We might actually be bidding farewell to the stigma surrounding pregnancy and infant loss in real time as the press continues to flood in about this account. _ I’ve been rendered speechless the past couple of days by the continued coverage of my work, with the hope of squashing the shame associated with miscarriage. _ I was floored when I stumbled upon @cosmopolitan_fr’s piece and countless others today! @bustle @romperdotcom and more coming soon. Australia, New Zealand, South Africa, the U.K., France: truly global. This was my aim. _ In answer to questions that have rolled in: ✨ Pregnancy and infant loss cards as well as enamel pins are available in my online shop: shop.drjessicazucker.com. ✨ Rainbow mama and babe tees are available through @feministapparel. I teamed up with them a few months back. They handle all production and orders. ✨ If you’d like to share your story on this page, please feel free to DM me for guidelines. . ✨ To see the full list of press coverage of the #IHadAMiscarriage campaign, head over to my online shop. ✨ Be sure to check out my IG stories where I highlight amazing women in the loss community doing bad ass work in an effort to build community and break silence. _ I commissioned @samanthajhahn to do this beautiful artwork for the #IHadAMiscarriage campaign. As always, her work is next level. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #pregnancyloss #stillbirth #grief #loss #motherhood #rainbowbaby #pregnancyafterloss #infantloss #1in4 // Original piece found in @selfmagazine. Link in profile.
✨Raise your hand if you are ready to witness the eradication of shame following pregnancy + infant loss✨ _ I’m humbled by the overwhelming response to the @selfmagazine feature of my work, specifically highlighting this IG community. Truly in awe. Pieces like these give me hope that we are on the precipice of a cultural sea change. _ Endless gratitude to all the other outlets who picked up the story: @refinery29uk, @womenshealthmag, @huffpost @stylistmagazine, @yahoo, @the.independent, @themightysite and more. _ Spotlighting the ubiquitous experience of pregnancy loss is bound to shatter silence, soften stigma, eschew shame. _ To all you women out there who have lost pregnancies/babies, I send my loving support and my gratitude for your courage to speak your truth. We are 1 in 4. We are stronger together. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #miscarriage #stillbirth #infantloss #grief #loss #motherhood #pregnancyloss #rainbowbaby #1in4 // Photo by @deanastacia found via @girlgazeproject.
There is a need to understand that it is not your fault if you lose your baby. You are not the one who wanted this unfortunate thing to happen. Jessica Zucker needs to be applauded for her courage to start this movement #IHadAMiscarriage and share her story on social media.
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